Ever wonder why it's so hard to break an old habit and replace it with a new one? It's because your brain craves comfort and familiarity.
Consicously, you may want to do all the right things (get to bed on time, get up early, exercise, eat well etc.), but subconsciously, your brain wants to keep you comfortable (aka "safe") by sticking with the familiar habits that it knows and loves (watching one more episode of your favourite show and staying up later than you intended, hitting snooze on the alarm, opting for the couch over the treadmill and reaching for your favourite bag of chips) even if the conscious part of you desperately wants to change for the better.
Your subconscious mind doesn't do this deliberately to sabotage you (although it can sometimes feel like it!), it does these things because it thinks that it's protecting you. It doesn't want you to feel discomfort, so it tries to force you to stick with things that are familiar. Things that make you feel good in the moment even though they may not necessarily be things that are best for you long term.
If you've ever watched a show called Brain Games, you will also know that the complex piece of machinery that is your brain, is actually quite lazy and likes to take short cuts wherever it can.
You see, it takes a lot of energy to power your brain (around 20% of your bodies' total energy - even while resting!), and for this reason, your brain likes to conserve energy in any way it can, which is why you may find yourself living much of your life on autopilot.
Habits like brushing your teeth before bed, showering each day and leaving the house with enough time each morning to ensure you get to work on time may be some great automatic habits that you have adopted but on the other hand, you may also have picked up a few habits along the way that aren't as good for your overall wellbeing such as having a bowl of ice cream after dinner each night, getting out of bed with only 10 minutes to get ready before you need to leave the house or sitting in front of the TV the minute you arrive home from work or school.
Although for many of us, our everyday routines can get boring and monotonous from time to time, as much as we think we can do without them (and in the short term, we can, and it can be fantastic!), your brain actually craves routine much more than you think it does.
Have you ever had an extended period of time in your life where you weren't studying and didn't have a regular source of employment? If so, you probably remember the first few weeks being amazing.
Chances are you felt relaxed, you felt energised, you felt excited to start your days and you felt happy. There's nothing quite like having all the freedom in the world to do what you want, when you want.
But, as the weeks went by, you may have found yourself going to bed later and later and therefore getting out of bed later and later. Mealtimes were not structured and you found yourself eating late, skipping meals or eating random snacks and odd food combinations due to either not knowing what to make for yourself to eat, or not having the energy to.
Eventually, you may have found yourself going just a little crazy without any real explanation as to why. Why were you feeling so stressed and restless for no good reason? Why were you feeling tired and irritable? Why weren't you feeling the same sense of joy that you were in the beginning? You had all the time and freedom in the world. Why were you no longer able to enjoy it as much?
The answer is that your brain doesn’t like surprises. Your brain likes to know what to expect. It wants to know what it needs to do and when. Eliminating the guesswork from your day-to-day routines and habits is what your brain craves because it reduces the amount of energy that your brain needs to expend in order to operate effectively with as little effort as possible.
Familiar routines and habits are comfortable. Your brain knows what to expect when you stick to a schedule. Unfamiliar scenarios are uncomfortable because now your brain needs to work harder in order to process this new information, learn this new skill, perform this new task or make a decision.
Your brain doesn't like to make decisions. Decision making can be uncomfortable. It's too much effort and it takes too much energy. Our brains are lazy. They don't like that. They would rather just operate on autopilot performing tasks and habits that are familiar because it's easier.
But, keep in mind, that although comfort and predictability is the brain's preferred method of operation, being comfortable can also keep you stuck. Stuck in bad habits. Stuck in bad relationships. Stuck in bad jobs. Stuck in old and stale routines that aren't doing your health and wellbeing any good.
So, what happens when you want to create new habits and new routines that are better for you in the long term than the current set of habits that you have now? Well, ultimately, you may be able to stick with this new habit, routine etc. for a couple of days or weeks, but when your subconscious mind realises what's happening, it tries to put the brakes on and creates resistance.
The new habit or routine that you are trying to stick with becomes uncomfortable because it is not familiar. Your brain starts lobbing excuses at you as to why you can't or shouldn't perform that new routine or habit today. It starts telling you things like "I don’t have time today," or "I couldn't be bothered," or "Maybe I'll start tomorrow."
Knowing this now, you may feel that you'll never be able to stick with that new exercise program, your new skincare routine or meal prepping every Sunday.
If our brains are going to fight us every step of the way, how are we meant to create new and lasting habits that will benefit our health and wellbeing long term?
Well, although it can often be easier said than done, the best way to create new habits is to stop with the excuses. Ignore your subconscious mind's attempts to keep you comfortable.
Don’t have time? Make time. Don't feel like it? Do it anyway. Think that tomorrow (or "Monday") is a better day to start? It's not. Why? Because tomorrow, you're going to tell yourself the same thing.
If you don't feel like it now, what makes you think that you're going to feel like it later or tomorrow? Chances are, you won't. You're not going to magically become a different and more motivated person overnight. If you feel too tired, or too lazy, or too time-poor, or too distracted or too CBF'd today, you're probably going to feel the exact same way tomorrow.
If you've read one of my previous posts I Did 20 Minutes Of Cardio Per Day For A Month, Here's What Happened…, you might remember that when I first started my 30-day, self-imposed fitness challenge, I absolutely hated my 2 x 10 minute exercise bike sessions. Why? Because they were unfamiliar and uncomfortable.
More often than not, those 2 exercise bike sessions felt like the longest 10 minutes of my life (not that I’m dramatic or anything! 😂)!
I would wake up in the morning or get home from work in the afternoon and my subconscious mind would try so hard to make me skip it. It fought me every step of the way because it didn't want me to be uncomfortable.
It would say things like "Ugh, you hate exercise. Why are you doing this? Surely you're too tired for this. Let's just do it tomorrow. Wouldn't you rather sleep in or scroll on social media instead? It would be a lot more comfortable…"
A lot of time I didn't feel like it at all, but I somehow managed to push through the resistance and the discomfort and went and did it anyway - to the point where I would be lying if I said I didn't want to cry or throw things while I was waiting for that 10 minute session to be over, sometimes! 👑
The good news is, that if we can push through our discomfort for a while, the new habits themselves will eventually become your brain's new version of comfortable. Once you perform your desired habit often enough, it will then become your new "normal."
Nowadays, I actually find my morning exercise bike session an extremely relaxing way to start my day and I've actually come to enjoy it. I also enjoy my afternoon exercise bike session as it's a great way to transition from work mode to home mode and energise myself to complete the afternoon's chores.
I no longer keep my eye on the time stressing and swearing about how long my 10 minute exercise bike session is taking because my brain is now used to it and it has become a comfortable, predictable part of my daily routines.
So, next time you put your mind to creating a new desired routine or habit, why not do your best to push through and do it anyway? Don't let your subconscious mind try to unintentionally sabotage you - get comfortable with being uncomfortable until your new desired habit becomes second nature.
You were able to learn to make all of your current habits comfortable, so you're more than capable of making new habits comfortable and familiar too if you don't let your subconscious mind with all of its excuses talk you out of it. It's just going to take a little bit of time, effort and repetition. I believe in you - you've got this!
Happy to have you here and I hope you have a great day/ night!
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Hope to have you back soon. Thanks for reading.
Lisa. 😊xx
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